The Really Long Thread
- Thread starter rushm001
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I saw Monty Python once. I fell asleep.
- Joined
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I was really tired 
- Joined
- 29 Jul 2002
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[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Plain Jane. One-second duration, nice resonant reverberation, and pungent odor cloud with a nearly instantaneous 5-foot radius. Your standard, everyday, friendly fart.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Beefy One. Sounds loud and butch, e.g., 'BRAAAMMPPP!' Smells like a cross between a decaying meadow muffin on a hot day and a fresh dog-turd.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Eggy. Smells very much like rotten eggs (or hydrogen sulfide). A powerful odor which tends to put people off lunch. Often rips out in the fashion of a Bunbuster (see below).[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]
[/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Bunbuster. 'BRAAAP!' Sounds something like a Beefy One, except much more sudden and much more powerful. May smell either eggy or beefy. Leaves your ******* smarting. You really feel these babies.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Ripper. Sends seismic ripples to the next town. Rips the seams in the crotch of your pants. This fart genuinely hurts, and you can still feel it 20 minutes later. Anyone sitting nearby may experience hearing loss.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Diesel. Sputters to a start, but then keeps putt-putting along spewing out an endless cloud of dirty, noxious fumes.
Surprise! You didn't even know that it was there, but suddenly . . . 'BRRMP!' [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Gunshot. Sounds just like a gunshot. Unbelievably loud indoors. Hard to believe that this emanates from between your buttocks. Bullet explodes into billions of virulent odor molecules. Gunshot farts are relatively rare but, like guns, very dangerous.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif] [/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Squeaky. Puny and unsatisfying. Sounds a bit like a muffled 'Wheeeek,' but smells foul.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Worrier. The kind that seems to be a fart right up to the point at which you release it. At this stage, matters become less sure, as it feels too solid for comfort. You go to the bathroom and check your underpants at the first possible opportunity[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Poopie Prelude. It feels like it's going to be a large beefy one, but out comes a tiny little squeaker fart plus the head of something massive. You tense your buttocks fast, lest you give birth to the brown equivalent of a zeppelin.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Present. The type of fart that seems harmless, but then brings a small poop as a housewarming gift. You shuffle off to the toilet and give thanks you weren't in a business meeting or job interview when it happened. If you were, you're screwed.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Burble. Bubbly! Sometimes messy too.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]SBD (Silent But Deadly). Totally inaudible but somehow causes all the occupants in a room to collapse. Smell is undefined because nasal investigators haven't had time to analyze the odor before passing out. (This one is also known as SBL: Silent But Lethal and Toxic Assassin.)[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]GNL (Gambled 'n' Lost). You take a gamble that it's going to be a fart and stay where you are, but tragically come to realize that this is much more than a fart... Next big gamble: do you put your underpants in the laundry basket and hope your wife won't notice, do you wash 'em out yourself, or do you throw 'em away?[/FONT] [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Hydrated. The original wet fart, which leaves a mark on your pants and gives you a cold wet sticky sensation when you walk. Try to avoid this one if you're wearing white trousers.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Not Now Please! You feel the presence of a mighty fart but are unable to release it due to your situation (first date, new customer, important business meeting, etc.). You clench your buttocks together so hard you nearly have a stroke, and wait for the pressure to subside. Success depends upon a number of factors, but in the end you're probably going to have to face the music (literally). Or you can try the stealth approach (see below).[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Who, Me? You let it out as silently as possible and nobody hears it. You discreetly take deep sniffs and smell nothing. You think you got away with it. But 30 seconds later, as if released from a stasis field, everybody starts to cough and splutter. You point to the person next to you and try to look innocent.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Waker-Upper. The first fart of the morning. All that broccoli, beans, and beer you had for dinner last night has decayed and fermented into about 1,000 ml of noxious gas just dying to escape from your rectum. Whether you let go under the covers when you first wake up or hold it until you're taking your early morning pee, releasing that first fart of the day feels oh, so good and sets the tone for the whole day.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Dutch Oven. A fart you make in bed -- any kind at all -- followed up by holding your partner's head under the bedclothes so that he/she can get the full effect of it. Good for moving a stalled divorce process along. Very bad early in your marriage.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Beefy One. Sounds loud and butch, e.g., 'BRAAAMMPPP!' Smells like a cross between a decaying meadow muffin on a hot day and a fresh dog-turd.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Eggy. Smells very much like rotten eggs (or hydrogen sulfide). A powerful odor which tends to put people off lunch. Often rips out in the fashion of a Bunbuster (see below).[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]
[/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Bunbuster. 'BRAAAP!' Sounds something like a Beefy One, except much more sudden and much more powerful. May smell either eggy or beefy. Leaves your ******* smarting. You really feel these babies.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Ripper. Sends seismic ripples to the next town. Rips the seams in the crotch of your pants. This fart genuinely hurts, and you can still feel it 20 minutes later. Anyone sitting nearby may experience hearing loss.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Diesel. Sputters to a start, but then keeps putt-putting along spewing out an endless cloud of dirty, noxious fumes.
Surprise! You didn't even know that it was there, but suddenly . . . 'BRRMP!' [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Gunshot. Sounds just like a gunshot. Unbelievably loud indoors. Hard to believe that this emanates from between your buttocks. Bullet explodes into billions of virulent odor molecules. Gunshot farts are relatively rare but, like guns, very dangerous.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif] [/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Squeaky. Puny and unsatisfying. Sounds a bit like a muffled 'Wheeeek,' but smells foul.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Worrier. The kind that seems to be a fart right up to the point at which you release it. At this stage, matters become less sure, as it feels too solid for comfort. You go to the bathroom and check your underpants at the first possible opportunity[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Poopie Prelude. It feels like it's going to be a large beefy one, but out comes a tiny little squeaker fart plus the head of something massive. You tense your buttocks fast, lest you give birth to the brown equivalent of a zeppelin.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Present. The type of fart that seems harmless, but then brings a small poop as a housewarming gift. You shuffle off to the toilet and give thanks you weren't in a business meeting or job interview when it happened. If you were, you're screwed.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Burble. Bubbly! Sometimes messy too.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]SBD (Silent But Deadly). Totally inaudible but somehow causes all the occupants in a room to collapse. Smell is undefined because nasal investigators haven't had time to analyze the odor before passing out. (This one is also known as SBL: Silent But Lethal and Toxic Assassin.)[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]GNL (Gambled 'n' Lost). You take a gamble that it's going to be a fart and stay where you are, but tragically come to realize that this is much more than a fart... Next big gamble: do you put your underpants in the laundry basket and hope your wife won't notice, do you wash 'em out yourself, or do you throw 'em away?[/FONT] [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Hydrated. The original wet fart, which leaves a mark on your pants and gives you a cold wet sticky sensation when you walk. Try to avoid this one if you're wearing white trousers.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Not Now Please! You feel the presence of a mighty fart but are unable to release it due to your situation (first date, new customer, important business meeting, etc.). You clench your buttocks together so hard you nearly have a stroke, and wait for the pressure to subside. Success depends upon a number of factors, but in the end you're probably going to have to face the music (literally). Or you can try the stealth approach (see below).[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Who, Me? You let it out as silently as possible and nobody hears it. You discreetly take deep sniffs and smell nothing. You think you got away with it. But 30 seconds later, as if released from a stasis field, everybody starts to cough and splutter. You point to the person next to you and try to look innocent.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Waker-Upper. The first fart of the morning. All that broccoli, beans, and beer you had for dinner last night has decayed and fermented into about 1,000 ml of noxious gas just dying to escape from your rectum. Whether you let go under the covers when you first wake up or hold it until you're taking your early morning pee, releasing that first fart of the day feels oh, so good and sets the tone for the whole day.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, Verdana, Sans serif]Dutch Oven. A fart you make in bed -- any kind at all -- followed up by holding your partner's head under the bedclothes so that he/she can get the full effect of it. Good for moving a stalled divorce process along. Very bad early in your marriage.[/FONT]
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kcnychief said:It's actually the one thing I wouldn't google image search and post here
When I lived on campus, my xbox was called "thepinksockdotcom" haha
Yeah I just typed in pink sock and got a result for urban dictonary and yeah you know the rest
Your just sick...I think thats my que to stop coming here for awhile :laugh:
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Tittles said:Yeah I just typed in pink sock and got a result for urban dictonary and yeah you know the rest
Your just sick...I think thats my que to stop coming here for awhile :laugh:
Don't be scared youngin', come on in the water is warm.
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Xie wrote on Electronic Punk's profile.
Impressed you have kept this alive this long EP! So many sites have come and gone.
Just did some crude math and I apparently joined almost 18yrs ago, how is that possible???
Just did some crude math and I apparently joined almost 18yrs ago, how is that possible???
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